12.20.2012

Am I insane?

Hello lovely readers! It's Thursday!! Which means it's almost Friday, which means it's almost time for Christmas break!
STILL INSPIRED! YAYAY!

I get 11 days off this year, and I will try to blog, but it may not happen, and you'll probably be all busy with Christmas and all that jazz anyway, so as if you'll even notice!

Um.. I drank a little too much caffeine today, so I wrote a super long post but it was basically gibberish and me talking about dentist appointments and chiropractor appointments, and then I re-read it and found it extremely boring, so I deleted it to save you from the whirring of my brain. My gift to you!

Speaking of chiropractors (here we go again - sorry! I tried to save it but the caffeine is hindering my impulsiveness), is anyone else out there like, hyper sensitive and self-conscious of themselves when going to the chiropractor? I mean, I'm hyper sensitive at the dentist, at the doctor, but man... the things I think of before I go to the chiropractor - I may be clinically insane.

Since my problem area is my hip, it means my chiropractor has to get all up in my trunk. Like, he's pretty much face-down in my butt. That may be a slight exaggeration, but.. there really isn't a polite way to describe the friendship that he and my butt have developed. And he practices active release, so he uses my leg, holding my foot against his leg, to apply pressure. All of this means that I'm super nervous.

Will I toot in his face?

What if I have to pee?

In the summer: are my feet clean, pretty smelling and smooth?
In the winter: are my feet too cold? Do my socks match? Do they smell bad? Are they sweaty?

Are my pants flexible enough? But will they stay up when he bends me in all weird positions so I don't accidentally moon him and then toot in his face?

Does my butt smell like roses?

And I'm not sure why I'm so concerned about tooting, really, since girls don't do that. And of course my butt smells like roses. Or maybe cookies, even. Yum, yum, that's my bum!



Oh my god, I hope he doesn't google search me and read this because that would be horrible. Hi, Dr. Colin! I'm really just looking out for your best interests! I'm kinda nice like that! Thanks for keeping me nimble!

So.. my question for you is this: do you have insanely neurotic worries and concerns when going to the chiropractor? Or doctor? Or dentist? I'd love to hear them. I'm not crazy, am I? Should I be adding a visit to the psychiatrist to my list of appointments?

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